Nowadays most people meet through online dating

I believe I am doomed to be alone. I have been married twice, right now I am single. The issue is, I am picky. I don’t believe it’s being picky, I believe it’s being rational. I know I won’t be in a successful relationship with someone that is not college educated; I know they need to be lawful and have spent no time in jail; I know they need to believe in a higher power, whatever that means to them, and so on. There is no such person in the area of Florida where I live. I refuse to do the online dating thing. Too superficial. What’s a girl to do? I own my own business but I am a computer consultant so I do a lot of my work behind my iMac. Suggestions would be great.

Your requirements for a husband do not seem particularly picky: a college education, religious (but no particular religion) and law-abiding. You are not making demands about good-looks, money, brains, age or qualities of personality such as kind, thoughtful, considerate, fun-loving, ambitious, etc. I imagine most of these go without saying. You say there are no such men where you live in Florida. I have never been to Florida (I am picturing a swamp with alligators and mosquitoes, but no men.) Nevertheless, you have married twice, so there must be a few men here and there who seemed suitable. Of course, you could move. You seem to have a profession that would enable you to find work anywhere.

I strongly encourage everyone to use online dating. Those I have persuaded, including members of my own family, are not superficial. They are all sorts. They are defined simply by the obvious wish to meet someone. Of course, there are superficial men and women on these online dating sites as they are everywhere; but there are plenty of people who would fulfill your requirements. You just have to be prepared to wade through a lot of men who obviously are not desirable. If you make a date for an hour or so for the first time, you will not have wasted much time.
Of course, women hesitate to use online dating sites for other reasons. The most important is: they think online dating  carries a stigma. It no longer does, if it ever did.

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Fred Neuman, M.D. is the Director of the Anxiety and Phobia Treatment Center. After serving as Associate Director for 21 years, Dr. Neuman assumed the directorship in 1994. Educated at Princeton University and the NYU College of Medicine, Dr. Neuman specializes in the treatment of anxiety disorders. He is the author of the following books: Caring: Home Treatment for the Emotionally Disturbed, Fighting Fear: An Eight Week Guide to Treating Your Own Phobias, Worried Sick?: The Exaggerated Fear of Physical Illness, and Worried Sick? The Workbook. Dr. Neuman is also the author of numerous magazine and newspaper articles on the efficacy of Cognitive/Behavioral Therapy for the treatment of anxiety disorders. Dr. Neuman is a member of the American Psychiatric Society, The American Association for the Advancement of Science and the New York Academy of Science. Dr. Neuman is also the author of the following novels: "The Seclusion Room," Viking Press. "Maneuvers" Dial Press "Come One, Come All," "The Wicked Son," "Detroit Tom and His Gang" "Superpowers." All these books are available from Amazon.

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